“The bells are ringing out for christmas day…”

Suffering from boxing day blues. I never used to get hangovers like this in my teens. Probably shouldnt have been drinking anyway seen as I’d had 3 different types of tablet before dinner…”Helps your stomach’ said Nobel prize winning Doctor My Mum, which doesnt explain why my bowls are still angry on boxing day.

Atleast the drink allowed me to hone my karaoke skills to the tune of Neil Diamond’s ‘Sweet Caroline’ (Buckfast Wine!), as well as practice a bit of dancing Village People YMCA style. Free Daily Mail interactive quiz TV went down a storm too…or atleast the womenfolk stormed out when they felt the male elements present were getting a bit too excitable and competitive.

Went to bed about 1am, with one of the dogs sleeping on top. Woke up to find a large wet patch on the bed. The dog’s fault, I hope.

Anyway, excuse me…toilet time!

Winter of Discontent

Finished up work for Crimbo on Saturday, celebrated with a Chinese take-away. Big, big mistake, as I felt ill already by the time Match of the Day started, and by Sunday morning I was thoroughly rendered bed-bound. By Sunday night the entire household was clutching their stomachs’, queing up outside the bathroom. Perhaps this was a virus unrelated to the Chinese? Better not be too hasy reporting said take-away emporium to the council’s health and safety department. I have contacts there you see, spent my work experience with them as a lad of 15.

Anyway, a quick search of the family’s predicament on wikipedia reveals the virus will be unlikely to bugger off out of our systems for 72 hours. That’s right, 3 whole days. Normality will not be resumed till Boxing day apparently. Who will cook the Turkey at this rate? Who will be able to stomach it? Looking like Turkey soup for us at the moment.

Thats the least of my worries though…due to start placement as a Secondary Teacher in January. Why am i doing this? I don’t know myself, all i’m sure about is that its the last thing i want to do with my life. Must have been drunk when i applied for this course. Don’t know what to do, but only got 2 weeks to make up my mind…wish i could be a journalist of some description, but its a dream the family pours scorn upon, teaching is a safer route apparently.

HELP

Evil-Scotsman